Back to the Garden Part 7: Conscious Partnership

by Curtis Lang		print version
		print version (graphics)

“If love is understood as the meeting of two souls – not just a sexual, biological meeting of male and female hormones – then love can give you great wings, it can give you great insights into life,” says Zen Master Osho. “And lovers can become for the first time true friends. Otherwise they have always been enemies in disguise.”

Stock Photo

Of course it’s true! Because the lovers have sought to possess one another, to reshape one  another to conform to their ideal images of what love ought to be, they have been secret enemies, not friends. Because they have sought to satisfy their desires by consuming one another, sexually, emotionally, and energetically, they have been enemies. It is extremely sad, but it is true. This is what we discovered in our exploration of narcissistic, romantic love.

How then shall lovers become friends, even partners?

By joining their love with Divine Love and consciously choosing to express that Divine Love in their lives, through acts of mutual compassion and creativity. This conscious act of co-creation with the Divine is what separates the Partnership love union from the Narcissistic love union we discussed in the last segment.

The main difference between the two types of love union is that the Partnership love union is a lasting love that continues to live beyond the grave, while Narcissistic love can never last.

Connecting One Another with the Divine Lovers

The lovers in a conscious sexual love union share a common intent to connect one another to the world of spirit, to the universal source of energy and form that sustains creation, to the Father/Mother Source. These conscious lovers also understand that they have a unique and mysterious connection that feeds them, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Together they agree to explore that connection to discover the origins of their love.

According to the ancient law of resonance and attraction, in any sexual union you will always connect with those individuals and energies that are in harmony with your own energies, your own stage of spiritual development, your own mental and emotional state, at any given time.

By your desire, conscious or unconscious, to join in a sexual love relationship, you attract the partner appropriate to you, the partner who can be your perfect mirror, and who is the source and example of qualities and virtues most lacking in your consciousness.

Photo by Jane Sherry

This same law of resonance and attraction states that within your love relationship, you must have a conscious intent to attract the highest and best energies to you for your spiritual growth, and that of your partner, or your sexual union will simply open the doors in your auric field to all energies and spiritual beings, with potentially disastrous results.

Omraam Aïvanhov says that many beings in spirit realms are unfriendly to humans. When they can enter an unprotected human aura, they feed on the baser emotions of human beings. These spiritual parasites promote lust, jealousy, possessiveness, hatred, envy, greed and fear.

When we have sex, without spiritual protection, we run the risk of taking on these spiritual parasites,especially if our sexual activity stems in whole or in part from the baser emotions of lust, jealousy, possessiveness, envy, greed, or fear.

This type of unconscious sexual union typically is a narcissistic, karmically driven relationship that often results in a variety of catastrophes.

As we have seen, the vast majority of love relationships and marriages on planet Earth are clockwork mechanisms, driven by karma and egoistic desire. Such relationships are textbook examples of conditional love.

But how can we attain an unconditional love, a lasting love, a love that uplifts us and our partner to new spiritual heights?

The great challenge for those who want a love that lasts, a love that uplifts and enlightens them, that frees them from the bonds of the illusory self and leads to conscious connection with the Higher Self, is to surrender the ego and to end karma.

Let me briefly summarize some of the basic steps toward achieving that end. To achieve a lasting union with another the lovers must work toward greater and greater Self-love. Through spiritual practices, each must work to establish a link to the Higher Self. This will give each of them access to inner spiritual guidance that will facilitate their spiritual growth and speed them on the path to their spiritual goals.

from "The Androgyne" by Elemire Zolla published by Crossroad

The Higher Self is the opposite sexual polarity from the physical body, so understand that your love partner is your perfect mirror, attracted to you through the law of resonance, and that this person reflects to you many of the qualities of your Higher Self. You will benefit from becoming conscious of these qualities in your lover, and acknowledging the Divinity within them which is the Source of these admirable qualities. Make efforts to learn from your lover, and to incorporate their admirable qualities into your own psyche.

Using shared conscious intent to spiritualize your love relationship, create a bond with beings of love and light in higher worlds. Visualize that you and your lover are connected with the Divine Lovers, the Source of Creation.

Intent is the key to successful relationships, no matter where you are on the path of love. Focus your intent on the desired outcome, a relationship in which both partners share the goal of experiencing a lasting, spiritual love. And if you are currently in a relationship, focus your intent on bringing the Divine into the center of your loving exchange. Make it your unwavering intent that your love be a gift to the Divine. Offer up the love and light you share to those who dwell in spiritual worlds, and be assured that this offering will trigger an influx of love and light into your heart, and into your relationship.

Whether or not your lover shares your spiritual path, focus your intent and your prayers on a single goal – that your loving exchange should become a path to spiritual growth and development for both parties, and that all difficulties, quarrels, obstacles and misunderstandings between you become stepping stones on the path toward a Divine love, a love that transcends the narrow concerns of ego and personality. Remember that no one has ever succeeded in improving their love relationship one bit by demanding that their lover improve themselves.

On the other hand, if you work to improve yourself, to end your own bad habits, to transform anger, fear, greed, jealousy, envy, impatience and doubt into compassion, generosity, patience, forgiveness, faith and love, then your love relationship will almost certainly improve.

To improve your self, and to progress on the path of self-love through your loving relationship, make your relationship a spiritual practice.